Type “single moms” into your favorite search engine and you’ll quickly find that 90% of the links that pop up after you hit enter have to do with single mom dating sites. This makes me sick. I want information on how to be the best single mom possible, and bringing a man into the mix is not it.



Do I think that single moms have the right to love and marriage? Of course, but when done in the proper way. It makes me sick when a mom becomes single for the first time and becomes obsessed with finding someone else. I take seriously the people I bring into my children’s lives, and I wish other single moms would do the same.

From what I understand, it takes almost 2 years for a single mom to deal with the loss (whether through death, divorce, or separation) of their child’s father. This allows us time to deal with the issues, heal, and be able to have another relationship that is free of baggage. I’ve been by myself for the past 9 years. I have had chances to start dating a few guys, but I am very picky about who I will bring into my children’s lives.



I created a list. In order to begin dating again, the guy must meet the criteria on the list. If he doesn’t, I know he won’t benefit me or my girls. Until then, I will continue to focus on my children and what they need. Naturally, we all want to be loved, but it doesn’t need to come at the expense of our self esteem, or our children’s well being.



My advice to newly single moms is to wait. Don’t seek love out, but rather wait for it to come naturally. Then examine the individual you are considering thoroughly to make sure that person has your best interests and the best interests of your children at heart.